Well thanks BBC2 for this new tea-time waste of time. Too Much TV is the perfect name for a desperate and disparate bunch of ‘presenters’ – some with little or no presenting experience – chatting awkwardly about television shows that are all at least 469% better than the one they’re hosting.
They’re a motley crew of left-over raffle prizes in the school hall that should never have been grouped together (“The chocolate and wine are gone! I want to get my moneys worth but I don’t want lavender soap or a fucking Spanish wicker donkey!”). They’re like the very end of a list of potential presenters shouted out at random at a BBC meeting: “Can we get Dermot O’Leary? Fiona Bruce? Oh God, Terry Wogan has died! How about Carol Vorderman?… None of them? Oh shit, I guess this lot will have to do”.
Aled Jones and Sara Cox make a good go of it. But Rufus Hound is immediately mugging to camera, looking increasingly desperate, like Chris Christie standing behind Donald Trump on Super Tuesday, looking like a hostage who is slowly dying inside. “Dear God, what have I done?” Emma Bunton is on it too, but honestly I’ve seen two episodes now and I can’t be bothered to watch any more, even for research.
Even by the lowly standards of The One Show, this programme is balls. Just utterly pointless. I was hoping it would be a helpful tv guide, but a review of last night’s tv seems to take up the majority of the half hour show. Cue more anxiety that you’ll never have time to catch up with all the good stuff on iPlayer etc.
The guests do their best to be entertaining, trying not to look awkward on what looks to be a very uncomfortable sofa. And then, three minutes on what’s on tv tonight – which was what I thought was the actual purpose of the show. I hate to be a pain but I want to plan ahead – what’s good on Friday? Do I have to wait until Thursday to find out? Well stuff you then – I’ll read the Radio Times or look at previews online, like normal people.
A show this bad needs to be very careful… “It’s amazing that this show was ever commissioned” says Rufus Hound, of Insane Pools: Off the Deep End (Animal Planet). Don’t look so smug Mr Hound, hiding behind your gigantic suite of facial hair. He who works in glass studios shouldn’t throw stones.
Too Much TV has like 30 episodes to go. Why?! WHY?!! Just pop the test card on for 30 minutes. But if you do feel like you’re missing out, have a look on iPlayer
But don’t – really, don’t.